It's Sunday - time for confession Father

[Barrykearley]

4 hours ago, Stuart Monument said:

Sounds like just another Esprit Barry, they are all a pain in the arse but for some reason we love them for it. 

What really proper p£sses me off is the simple things. I have receipts for lots of dosh spent on this car - yet even the simple stuff is a bag'o'shite. It simply shouldn't have any back street bodges going on with vac pipes, iac, tps, throttle, lambda wires jointed with choc strip 2 inches away from the turbo ....etc etc. All simple to sort - but WHY 

[sailorbob]

One word - laziness.

I once bought an engine where they fitted a non genuine lambda sensor and because it didn't have the OE connector they bodged it and wired the heater feed +V into the ecu input for the lambda signal

[C8RKH]

It's not just old car's Barry that get bodged. My son took his Corsa in to the main dealer for it's 2nd annual service. 1 week later oil patch all over my newly laid block drive where he parks it. WTF - take it back to the main dealers and the dickheads had knackered the oil filter fitting. I mean, FFS, hardly the hardest and most technical job on a 1.2 Corsa to screw the oil filter on. They fixed it but no apology, no sorry for your inconvenience having to take half a day off work and a 40 mike round trip.

I'd expect some bodges on on a 20+ year old car Barry. Admit, you love it really as the satisfaction is doing the job right and enjoying the drive after

[Stuart Monument]

The annoying thing is , that it take just as long to bodge something as it does to do it properly! 

[C8RKH]

Tell me about it!  Every job I do takes longer than an expert and results in me swearing and the job being bodged. That is why I only ever let experts do the jobs on my little toys - I choose the surgeon who will work on my beloved Scarlett's internals (2010 Evora NA with no back seats don't you know) more carefully than a woman chooses the plastic surgeon for her boob job!

Rest assured, if I ever do sell Scarlett, you can be assured that she has only ever been fettled by the finest, (Clarkson voice now), "car surgeons in the world!"

[Barrykearley]

Haha - that's what you think @C8RKH.

like my ones po thoughts !!! Used cars are like women - you only find out the truth too late 

[C8RKH]

You mean they look divine, they seduce you, they promise you the ride of your life, you think you're onto a winner, then the engine breaks down and you both end up with a headache?

And wives wonder why we love our cars so much....

[Jacques]

While I agree that some of this is true, I think there is another aspect that I will take into account regarding old cars and possible repairs on them. That is the sparepart situation. Many interesting cars are old cars, and were made way before smart webpages with a direct access to ordering the exact parts were set up. For example when I first started driving Laverda, I spent 2½ year waiting for a new starter. From the factory... I joined a variety of national and foreign Laverda Clubs to try and sort it out myself, but to no avail. In the end I just couldn't get another starter and had to leave the starter off and blank the hole with a plate made to fit plus a gasket.

Or do you remember the hardship of getting spares via looking at the classifieds in foreign Club mags? Not exactly easy times.

Now? I can start my pc or use just a cellphone and 10 minutes later a new startermotor is on it's way from a variety of dealerships scattered all over the planet, if at all available.

When I go to my local (and only one in Denmark) Lotus dealer, and try to order say an airfilter or even just a paint repair stick, they start by saying "oh yes, we'll get that for you sir". Two weeks later they call me and say it's impossible. This have been the case in every single event that I've tried. So ultimately I gave up on Lotus dealers, because they simply cannot solve the problem.

Another point is, that there's noone with knowledge in working on a Esprit in their workshop. They know the car from a Picture, and mine is the only one they've ever seen in real life. Would I give them my car to Work on? Well of course not. Never!

This, I feel, adds to the number of badly done jobs on an old car.

Than God we have good forums, such as this! So thanks gents!

Kind regards,

Jacques.

[Chillidoggy]

19 hours ago, Barrykearley said:

Hmm so this afternoon I thought I'd pull off the chargecooler and look what's going on underneath it. Bust the two rubber mounts just by looking at them. Vac pipe underneath folded in half and cabletied up - that's meant to go onto the fuel pressure regulator...... ummm where's the oneway valve as well

took off the old throttlejack and binned that. Plus the 1m of pipe with a bolt in the end of it.

round to the brakes - 3 error codes on the abs unit - more to work on. Will set the brake pedal switch, test that and clean all the other contacts up.

so thought I'd have a look at that heater mechanism - dropped fuse tray into the car - I can just see the green actuator cable - but operating the twisty doober heater knob doesn't move it. Getting a bad feeling the rod/cable is bust. Will take off the heater panel later and try and pull the cable manually to see if it's busted. God knows how I'm going to replace it if it is - but it's either a grenade or cut a hole in the body under the bonnet to access it.

bstard cars a pain in the ass ! 

It'll be easy once you've got the binnacle off, and taken the windscreen out.

[Sparky]

1 hour ago, ian29gte said:

It'll be easy once you've got the binnacle off, and taken the windscreen out.

In my experience, one can lead to the other.

[Barrykearley]

Legend has it someone once broke a screen removing a binnacle.

[Barrykearley]

stereo out and heater bits accessed. Looks what I find !! That green cable should be in the clamp. Have had a slight fiddle - but it just seems to slip back out. The good news is it does look like the bit the other end which is almost impossible to get to moves. Will clean the end up - try some tape and shims and see if that helps hold it in place

[Sparky]

You lead a charmed life.

[C8RKH]

Electrifying updates Barry. Can't wait for the next one.

[Barrykearley]

Eldest had swimming - only get halfway there and she doesn't feel well - can we go home Dad??  if you insist.

Get home and off I shoot like a rat out the trap - garage time.

straighten the end of the connecting rod. Reshape the clamp. Bit of tape round the sleeve. All back together and it works !!! Well it moves the actuator and that's good enough for me. Can't start her due to the chargecooler being sat somewhere it shouldn't be.

so do I move onto the next job - like f@ck do I - that's a beginners mistake - whilst I'm on the good luck garage run - time to stop before as if by magic the f@ck up fairy pays a visit.

did pull out all the cluster mess from the handsfree kit though - will ditch that and stick a new DVD player in it for Danny which will have Bluetooth. 

[Jacques]

Sounds good Barry. Which btw. reminds me of how many good and well working cars got lots of trouble usually serious because of someone trying to fit a new radio

Kind regards,

Jacques.

ps: Bluetooth? Is that one of them new thingies which can make my shoe talk to my wristwatch if I run 5 miles? Because I was taught in school that we had a king here in Denmark called by that name.

[Chillidoggy]

I can see this thread will soon grow legs and end up being moved to the "Project and Restoration" section.

[Barrykearley]

Yeah yeah yeah - the drop down menus ain't my strong point

[Chillidoggy]

Neither is resisting the purchasing of Esprits that need some titivation.

[Barrykearley]

Look - I reckon most esprits suffer with bodge garage syndrome and the only way of avoiding this it to buy one that's been enthusiast fettled. Of course there's a risk here of bodge city as well.

this one will end up right and funnily enough I think it's not going to be expensive to deniggle, just take some time and effort. If it's abs accumulator that's knackered that will be annoying. 

cant wait to start her up once Ive replaced these pesky pipes under the chargecooler and check if the heater actually works. Broke the rubber chargecooler mounts taking it off - so waiting in that eBay purchase to turn up. Need to update my spreadsheet with regards to spending on this one, my eBay has been a bit busy this week!!

[Chillidoggy]

I think most Esprits probably needed titivation when they were new, from what I've seen on mine!

[Vanya]

7 hours ago, Barrykearley said:

Look - I reckon most esprits suffer with bodge garage syndrome and the only way of avoiding this it to buy one that's been enthusiast fettled. Of course there's a risk here of bodge city as well.

this one will end up right and funnily enough I think it's not going to be expensive to deniggle, just take some time and effort. If it's abs accumulator that's knackered that will be annoying. 

cant wait to start her up once Ive replaced these pesky pipes under the chargecooler and check if the heater actually works. Broke the rubber chargecooler mounts taking it off - so waiting in that eBay purchase to turn up. Need to update my spreadsheet with regards to spending on this one, my eBay has been a bit busy this week!!

I've been reflecting on this recently too. The vast majority of Esprits I've run into have been seriously bodged pieces of shit. To cop a phrase from South Parks Mr Garisson, It looks like their previous owners have attempted to "r*pe them to death". Perhaps it's because they could be had for 5000 quid for a while there and were bought by people who actually should have been buying a mid 90s Renault Clio instead. 

The number of genuinely enthusiast fettled Esprits is tiiiiiiiny. Sure the ad descriptions are always the same "thousands spent, big stack of invoices" - but all those jobs have usually been done AFTER something has said bang. So the underside of the car is a dogs dinner with certain things haphazardly replaced and the rest just left dirty and neglected (like a garage or an owner in a hurry would do).

On a positive note, most stuff is quite easily rectified, even if it is a pain in the ass (like the S4 I viewed recently with a sweet stainless manifold that some wally had fitted using regular nuts and no lock tabs....)

 

Barry, where do you source your sheds from? I'm guessing you're not buying them from Paul Matty for 30 grand a pop. Let me in on your secret. I want an S4 too!

[Barrykearley]

 

3 hours ago, Vanya said:

Barry, where do you source your sheds from? I'm guessing you're not buying them from Paul Matty for 30 grand a pop. Let me in on your secret. I want an S4 too!

The v8 was from Paul Matty 

The S4 from a chap local to me who I met at a breakfast club. I hasten to add - I don't think he did anything work wise to it himself - always off to a specialist.

anyhow - onwards and upwards. New red vac pipes came today, one way breather valve and I've just bought a rake of stainless bolts/nuts/nylocks. Just waiting on the shock mounts for the chargecooler to come now. I'm planning on a little session replacing pipes and rusty shit sometime soon. 

There's a nice S4 lurking around that used to belong to @johnpwalsh - dunno if that ones sold yet or not

To be fair I'd always prefer buying a shed at the right money - but I've now learnt even the most trusted of garages in general can't be trusted to do the job right...... I likes to add value to the cars if I can so I'm always value positive on them should the worst ever happen

[Stuart Monument]

1 hour ago, Barrykearley said:

I likes to add value to the cars if I can so I'm always value positive on them should the worst ever happen

Oh dear Barry you are starting to believe your own 'mrs' talk. Your talking to the lads now, we won't tell her honest 

[Barrykearley]

 no to be fair - my lotus addiction really has been kind financially. Yep there's cheaper hobbies - but there's dearer ones too.

anyway - 30seconds tonight - and the breather hose is fitted to the fuel pressure regulator and back to the crank breather via the oneway valve. Yeah that was really expensive to do right !!!

roll on postman tomorrow with the shock mounts for that chargecooler.