Bahar Suspended

[Quicker]

so - what now...? http://www.autoblog.com/2012/06/08/lotus-fires-ceo-dany-bahar-amidst-controversy/#continued

[Suddabym]

It's all lies. Lies! They're out to get me. They were jealous of my awesomeness and ability to turn Ferrari around from being a highly successful supercar company into a still highly successful premium supercar company. With leather jackets. And teeth. And plimsoles.

You wait. I've left a message with Noble and when they call back... You'll see.

This isn't the end. I am a pheonix (just with a slight smell of glue and hair moose).

History will vindicate my marketing aceness. I took a respected and successful F1 team and painted fizzy drinks logos all over it; that's just how good I am, dammit.

Not Dany, but Dany's PA, because Dany is too awesome to write his own posts and wouldn't debase himself anyway because you're all glue sniffing old Lotus and he's so far ahead of his time even he doesn't know what he's up to.

[Moxie]

Mark,

I'm enjoying your posts so much that I thought I'd ask if you'd like to blog at GropeLotus.com, a domain I registered about a year ago on the suspicion that DB was going to take Lotus in to a tailspin, putting his own gain first, and that the domain would be a perfect venue for brutal and vicious sarcasm. But I think what you're rolling with here is much funnier than anything I had in mind, so it's yours if you want it. This could be the Fake Steve Jobs of the automotive world--book deals, talkshow appearances, who knows where it could end up?

I am curious though if you haven't bunkered up with Bizarro Dany Bahar because I found him in the boot of my Evora yesterday.

- Matt

[gt111]

I am loving the updates from the bunker

[Simon350S]

I just read group lotus have pulled out of sponsoring the Lotus F1 team.

Is that true? I've nod read it anywhere before although I don't read a lot. It makes my head hurt....

[Suddabym]

Been a tough day down here. Turns out Dany went into the store room, counted up the cans of fake tanning spray and worked out that there isn't enough to last ten years. I tried to console him by showing him how he could use his own ear wax as a hair styling gel, but it didn't work.

Now he wants to be CEO of the Chinese Space Programme. He recons there's a good chance he could actually get five launches in five years with those guys. See, genius. Anyway, I'm not going to tell him that they have a space station; could all go a bit Moonraker-y. Now he's designing space rockets using the beans he brought and the spam that we can't open. I've got to build a stand for the next international space rocket show (I know). My budget is five million Swizz-Francs (he's made up his own currency) and a free house and private jet.

Been a tough day.

[NedaSay]

I just read group lotus have pulled out of sponsoring the Lotus F1 team.

Is that true? I've nod read it anywhere before although I don't read a lot. It makes my head hurt....

Where did you read that?

The sponsorship as such as been stopped a few months ago. Lotus is pretty much using the F1plateforme free of charge in exchange for letting Genii using the Lotus F1 Team brand!

[Simon350S]

Ah, I see. Fair enough.....

[Bibs]

You know the war is over Simon, right?

[softlips]

I just read group lotus have pulled out of sponsoring the Lotus F1 team.

Is that true? I've nod read it anywhere before although I don't read a lot. It makes my head hurt....

That's not news, we've known that months.

[Simon350S]

There's been a war?

I've been on a different planet for 6 months. I'm trying to catch up so you'll have to bear with me!

[Iconic Ride]

This is a rough crowd, Simon. Totally ruthless.

Man up, mate!

[ramjet]

There's been a war?

Several. Mostly with those pesky Germans.

[TBD]

Several. Mostly with those pesky Germans.

I may have to take that personally!

[ramjet]

Nah Thomas. You're not pesky, so I've been told.

[Kimbers]

Backtrack City....ARF!

[Suddabym]

News from the bunker

It's beginning to pong down here a bit now. Dany's still cutting about in his Lotus Oringnals Y-fronts but now he's started wearing his own aftershave - 'Redbull Musk by Dany' and even though he's a marketing genius, it is a bit whiffy.

So, the other day when I was sorting out the stand for the space rocket show, that he wanted Buckingham Palace to host (he knows people there, apparently) I asked him who he wanted to do the catering. He thought I said Caterham and punched me in the face. Now I have to wear a sign saying 'Tony Fernandes is a Liberal Deomcrat, who's never worked at Ferrari, who can't come second in a race and I am his lover' which I thought was a bit mean. Tony never struck me that way - he always looked like a solid Tory voter to me.

Anyway, Manic called. Apparently the new guy turned up with his own socket set and is busy checking the torque settings of all the wheel nuts. And he's made Manic redesign the wing mirrors for the Esprit again. Poor old Manic; he's on his thirty ninth revision now. I told Dany that cameras don't actually work in the real work and he applied a bit direct marketing to my face. Man, this guy is good! And, apparently when the new guy visit the V8 test bed, he found out that Dany had told Wolverine to secretly build a V25 instead. Apparently the market is crying out for odd cylindered engines. It was supposed to go in the revised Eterne, to be renamed the Enorm and marketed as a twenty five seater minibus. Dany says that the market is crying out for a premium luxury minibus, built in Kazakstan and made out of yak hide. I can't see it but Dany is epic. Anyway, the new guy has turned it off and removed frois

[gt111]

Thank god, I have been waiting for a bunker update all day.

[Suddabym]

Dany, get off! I'm typing.

...gras from the canteen menu.

Luckily Dany doesn't want to work for the Chinese anymore, not unless they offer him a job, anyway. He has had one response to his CV mind. A job offer has come in from TVR. Apparently they're looking for a guy with premium exlusive car industry experience. They don't want to launch any cars, mind, just issue some dodgy drawings of cars that will never be built to Autocar every two years. Dany - being a marketing prince amongst pansies - thinks he could be the man for the job.

Manic just called back. Now the new guy has banned the sale of Redbull in the canteen. Dany isn't happy cos he was getting commission on that sweet deal.

Dany wants to know, if he ran for MP for Norfolk, based on the fact that the current guy is a muppet, would anyone vote for him? He thinks politics may be his calling. If not, then he's thinking of replacing Hammond on TG. After all he is a marketing genius, as the Lotus Ethos and Type 125 clearly prove.

Yes, alright Dany, I'll do your armpits, just gimme a moment!

Thank god, I have been waiting for a bunker update all day.

Don't worry, we're still down here. And when the revolution comes, Dany will return to the land of the Eloi (that's a reference to The Time Machine, by the way, but I may have misspelled it - Dany ate the only copy we have of it down here, yesterday) triumphant. And Ferrari will ask him to come back to launch their new MPV/hydrogen/1 seater race series and all will be well with the world again. Go Dany!

[Stirling_Villeneuve]

Steve Cropley ‏@StvCr

Shoot me down maybe, but I'm not happy Bahar's left Lotus. He had a plan. Now, unless Hicom blokes have remarkable insight, we have a vacuum

I agree 100%, it took a while for me to get DB but I finally got it... albeit too late. I'd love to think the likes of Zimmermann would stay but somehow I can't see a faceless businessman having the passion or vision to keep life interesting enough for people of that calibre. Perhaps the 5 car plan was a pipe dream but it got people excited about Lotus again and the Esprit was starting to look like it would finally happen. I can't say I hold out much hope right now but somehow I feel I should keep the faith... all in all very depressing news though.

[Suddabym]

Dany agrees

[ramjet]

Some questions for Dany, Mark.

1) Did he ever consider releasing details of the other vehicles he was planning for Lotus? (especially the motorcycles)

2) How was the renaming of the Red Bull Air Race series going? (I know that's meant to be hush hush)

3) Is there any truth to the rumors that he was speaking to NASA to assist with sponsorship of relaunching the space program (I believe he wanted to rename the Hubble telescope to the HuBahar telescope?)

If you could ask, it would be greatly appreciated since we couldn't seem to get many straight answers when he was at Hethel.

Ta much.

[Iconic Ride]

Dany: "Mark, could you please pass the mousse? No! No! The chocolate mousse, not the hair gel, you twit!"

Mark: "So sorry. It was an honest mistake, mate. You'll be wanting the sprinkles as well, I assume?"

Dany: "Indeed. And I couldn't help but notice that we're running rather low on the brandy snaps and blancmange."

Mark: "No worries. I've a decade's worth of banoffee pie in the food locker. And tomorrow we're having Tavuk göğsü for the evening meal, which should warm the cockles of your Turkish heart."

Dany: "You're a thoughtful bloke, Mark, and as a token of my appreciation, I'm permitting you use of a full three quarters of the duvet tonight."

Mark: "Quite kind of you, sir. It's become apparent to me that the "hunker in the bunker" life has served to mellow you out somewhat. I've not seen you attempt to call the Baldwin brothers for over a week now."

Dany: "Don't get too excited Marky boy, it's been mostly due to the dodgy mobile reception in this mole pit. Any chance of you putting an aerial topside? And your internet service positively sucks."

Mark: "We're not opening that hatch for nine more years, web breath, so get over it."

Dany: "That's bit harsh, mate. My Facebook account will go dormant by then. And with it the only 'friends' I have left. Get it? Get it?"

Mark: "If that's the level of humour I'm to expect, it's going to be a very long decade. You know any Ernst & Young type jokes?

Hey, how about this one? Why did the local independent accountant want to work with KPMG?…. So he could upgrade to a slide rule."

Dany: "Aarrggghhhh! It's going to be a really long decade."

[cnapan]

I'm expecting a small raft of changes in the hierarchy of the company but as long they get to keep Coco, Zimmermann, James and a few others the company will be fine!

I hope this is true too. What worries me is that I think it's important to have some charismatic and passionate figure who has a vision of success, who can hold a team together to achieve it and push towards some deliverables along the way, and there's a bit of a vacuum right now.

I have no idea whether Dany was good or bad in the end. I do know he was charismatic and I also know he had the chance to assemble a very impressive team of people in the cause. It doesn't bother me one jot about the marketing tie-ins with various rappers or whatever. However, looking forward, I can't see the statements from the guy in charge right now as indicating that he's the man to make the future happen. Hopefully they'll find someone else with a bit of fire in their belly. Dry corporate-speak is no use at all when you are trying to gather a large amount of other people's money to try to make an exotic range of high price sports cars which just might turn a decent profit some years down the line.

There has to be some emotion and passion in there. There has to be someone willing to move Lotus out of the comfort zone it's occupied for so long making a range of cars which barely scrape a profit on good years.

Oh well. Good luck Lotus!

Edited June 12, 2012 by cnapan

[chandrew]

I hope this is true too. What worries me is that I think it's important to have some charismatic and passionate figure who has a vision of success, who can hold a team together to achieve it and push towards some deliverables along the way, and there's a bit of a vacuum right now.

I suspect that they all have similar equity-linked contracts as Bahar reportedly had. Their decision to stay will likely to be influenced more by their perception of the future value of that element than the charisma of the leader.