People's reaction to the Esprit - what's yours?

[swindon_alan]

My stock response to the "do you know what LOTUS stands for?" question is now:

"Yes, indeed I do! It is Lots Of T* Usually Say - Lots Of Trouble..." (I can't bring myself to finish that off).

T*: insert your own abusive/derogatory plural term here, e.g. Twats, Tossers, Turds etc.

[TimSportsTourer]

19 minutes ago, C8RKH said:

Lol at a house warming at the weekend and a "friend" said you know what Lotus stands for? I told him he was a total pr!ck, a f@ckwit who obviously knew nothing about cars as he had a diseasel VW Passatt ffs and despite he was 55 he needed to grow up and wake up. He was a bit stunned and taken aback but later on we had a wee dram and all was good and he was genuinely interested in why I was so passionate about my car etc. I've since taken him out for a spin and let him drive it and he nearly wet his pants. I don't think he'll be using that term again anytime soon.

Yep – that'll do it. I still have etched in my memory the first time I ever drove a Lotus. Don't think I'll ever forget it, and here I still am, all these years later. You did a good job there, C8RKH! 

[Bibs]

If I hear that I ask which one they've had and what problems they had with it. Usually, embarrassed silence is the response...

[GTK]

3 minutes ago, swindon_alan said:

"Yes, indeed I do! It is Lots Of T* Usually Say...

...do you know what Lotus stands for? There's your out Alan

Yeah the jump in and I'll take you for a spin thing has to be the winner.

"Hey before you finish being a bastard, why don't I subject you to some lateral G. You bastard."

[TimSportsTourer]

1 minute ago, Bibs said:

If I hear that I ask which one they've had and what problems they had with it. Usually, embarrassed silence is the response...

I was once at a car-rental place that had a Ferrari to rent out. They changed the tyres every 3k miles and the clutch every 6k. If you spend that much on a car (with a cost of ownership that makes my eyes come out on stalks), and replace the engine every 20 mins or so, you'd hope it wouldn't break down that often. And they still do fail every now and again, just like ours. 

4 minutes ago, GTK said:

"Hey before you finish being a bastard, why don't I subject you to some lateral G. You bastard."

You are making me want to go out for a drive!

[Chillidoggy]

I particularly liked the Porsche:- "Pricks Or Rich Shitheads Can Have 'Em", and Ferraris:- "Fragile, Expensive Rides Repel All Reasonable Individuals."

[Mark Blanchard]

Next time I see a Ferrari I must remember to say "Nice Lotus Mate!"

[GTK]

It's one of life's most cruel ironic twists; the direct correlation between getting older and an attraction to cars made by Porsche. 

I watched a WHOLE video on a Cayman GTS yesterday and got a little excited. I feel dirty.

[TimSportsTourer]

47 minutes ago, GTK said:

It's one of life's most cruel ironic twists; the direct correlation between getting older and an attraction to cars made by Porsche. 

I watched a WHOLE video on a Cayman GTS yesterday and got a little excited. I feel dirty.

You make me feel young again!

[Chillidoggy]

2 hours ago, GTK said:

It's one of life's most cruel ironic twists; the direct correlation between getting older and an attraction to cars made by Porsche. 

I watched a WHOLE video on a Cayman GTS yesterday and got a little excited. I feel dirty.

 

You should be ashamed of yourself.

[Royal]

8 hours ago, swindon_alan said:

My stock response to the "do you know what LOTUS stands for?" question is now:

"Yes, indeed I do! It is Lots Of T* Usually Say - Lots Of Trouble..." (I can't bring myself to finish that off).

T*: insert your own abusive/derogatory plural term here, e.g. Twats, Tossers, Turds etc.

Alan, the correct answer is of course, Lots Of Technology Unique Styling.

[Iconic Ride]

9 hours ago, C8RKH said:

diseasel

Classic.

[C8RKH]

23 minutes ago, Iconic Ride said:

Classic.

You get a gold star for spotting that. Yes that was deliberate.

[Escape]

The same (dare I say middleaged) lady who already made clear she isn't too fond of the Esprit but whose company I very much appreciate, let me offer her a ride again yesterday. Apart from the strange noises from the back (the turbo spooling and blow-off valve releasing), she said she didn't understand why someone would build a car so low. I mentioned benefits for handling and proceeded to demonstrate this on a 270° on-ramp to the highway. She remained silent but cool. :-) And I did promise to bring the Range or Merc on our next date. I consider myself lucky we're going out despite my Esprit, and not because of it.

[peteyg]

Stopped for petrol this morning and the chap filling up next to me kept saying 'great car, cracking car, wow, love that car'. Nice start to the day putting a smile on someone's face. Then the 'foreign' fellow in the kiosk asked if it was a Maserati? Now that's a new one. Far less insulting than being asked if it's a Ferrari though - which I never have been.

Pete

[NeilP]

Ha ha, nice... I was told I can get an extra 21 miles from a tank using BP Ultimate.... 

200 miles between stops so a 10% gain in economy, are lotus drivers (or whatever people think we drive)  that gullible :0)

[TimSportsTourer]

23 minutes ago, NeilP said:

Ha ha, nice... I was told I can get an extra 21 miles from a tank using BP Ultimate.... 

200 miles between stops so a 10% gain in economy, are lotus drivers (or whatever people think we drive)  that gullible :0)

Not said about my Esprit but about my old Nissan 350Z, at the petrol pump: "Leave some for us!". I do feel a bit that way with the Esprit. Actually, I feel that way every 200 miles!

[march]

My first bad experience driving my Lotus - 3 people cut me up dangerously yesterday, 2 of which took  great pleasure in overtaking me on a loose newly laid surface (20mph limit) wellying past me before pulling in and showering the car in stone chippings. .

[Bibs]

Find somewhere nice to bury them?

[Escape]

31 minutes ago, Bibs said:

Find somewhere nice to bury them?

Why would it have to be nice? Any old quarry or landfill will do just fine. :-p

[Andyww]

Another niggle is when people who are roughly the same age as me, ie were into cars when the Esprit was first launched, usually comment that the engine is based on a Vauxhall. It usually takes some convincing that it's an all-Lotus engine.

Of course what they have in mind is the first prototype did use a Vauxhall block. It's amazing how these small facts stick. It would have been better if Lotus had kept this type of information secret.

On 10 August 2016 at 16:18, swindon_alan said:

My stock response to the "do you know what LOTUS stands for?" question is now:

"Yes, indeed I do! It is Lots Of T* Usually Say - Lots Of Trouble..." (I can't bring myself to finish that off).

T*: insert your own abusive/derogatory plural term here, e.g. Twats, Tossers, Turds etc.

Lots Of Twats Understand Sodall about them.

[silverfrost]

I must admit Andy i was one of those people for many years that used to think it was a vauxhall block and lotus has designed and used their own cylinder head, i have probably contributed to many people thinking this as have others only within the past few years did i know the truth......

[swindon_alan]

You are going to Lotus hell Dan. Right now. That's where you can only drive M100s in LHD format with the hood up, dressed in Ferrari racing replica track wear and are made to drink Watneys Red Barrel and cans of Party Sevens until you are very, very poorly...

 

[GTK]

 

Was helping my sister buy a classic this eve and when I told the chap I have an Esprit he gave me the L.O.T.U.S. schtick. I tried on the "lots of tw*ats..." thing for size but then I felt a little guilty and found myself making excuses for the car, and now I feel dirty. I've become one of those guys!? wtf happened!? 

 

[Iconic Ride]

On 8/10/2016 at 04:20, Bibs said:

If I hear that I ask which one they've had and what problems they had with it. Usually, embarrassed silence is the response...

I think that His Most Excellent Keeper of the Kingdom's Server has come up with the response permitting the greatest scope and range of nuanced delivery.

Say it with sincere inquisitiveness, and you've offended no one. Say it deadpan, and you've left room for sheepishness to envelope the offender. Say it with gusto, and you've achieved a vigorous point and personal catharsis concomitantly.